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Monthly Archives: May 2013

“Inspirational” quotes …

This post was written by one of my favorite guest bloggers; Victoria Rinfreschi.

She is a really talented 17 year old, whose passions include photography, art , and the occasional blog post (:


“There’s always light at the end of the tunnel”… that’s as redundant as me saying the toast is toasted. Of course there is light at the end of the tunnel, unless it’s night time, in which case we are all f***ed.

Life has a funny way of throwing us curve-balls when we least expect them. The funny part isn’t the tragedy itself but rather the unknown prophets who seem to emerge with a repertoire of fortune cookie mantras. They seem to pop up out of nowhere like weeds and, like weeds, once they sink their roots into fertile soil (in this case, said tragedy) they remain, forever sucking the life out of you.

You have to ask yourself, who comes up with all the nonsense “motivational” expressions that we so callously throw at people in difficult times? I always imagine a 30-something year old, fat Joe, in a pizza stained t–shirt and underwear, sitting in front of his computer, making money off the number of shares he gets for his recycled fortune cookie quote.  The most ironic thing of all is that none of those “whatever you set your mind to, you can do”, “Life is what you make it” bullshit, ever helped him amount to anything in his life.

Have you ever taken a moment to consider how ridiculous these sayings are, or were you too caught up in the pretty pictures and number of likes to notice? Just in case you were, here are a few, just to prove my point;

“In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away.”  What?  Like that heart attack, or near drowning experience, or maybe that really bad asthma attack that left you needing a nebuliser for a week? Yeah, you’re right; not breathing is so much more memorable than regular old breathing. Sure it sounds like a pretty quote, but logically it makes no sense. I don’t know about you, but none of my happy memories involve a lack of oxygen!

“When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile,” – because life really cares about you and your emotions. Because it’s life’s fault that you decided to buy a new phone instead of paying your bills, leaving you in so much debt that you can’t afford to eat. Yes, life will be really heartbroken by your thousand reasons to smile. Good on you, blame a non-existent, man-made entity for all your failures in life. Demonize your imaginary “frenemy”, because that will solve all your problems.

“What you allow is what will continue.” – I must say, the author of this one was a real genius. I wonder how long it took them to realize this. They have yet to realize that their realization wasn’t as profound as they originally thought it was! What a shame though. I’d give this an A for Almost.

These are the types of pointless expressions that we cycle and recycle around the web on a daily basis. If that wasn’t bad enough, we feel that it is our duty as caring, loving individuals, to spew this nonsense at any and all unsuspecting victims. We then go on with our lives, feeling good in the knowledge that we have now helped someone through a rough patch with our invaluable, “original” piece of advice! Their lives have forever been bettered now that they know that; “Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over, instead of craving control over what you don’t.”

Don’t you agree?

Paralysis By Analysis, Good Intentions and Procrastination

I have pretty much allowed this blog to die but, as a wise friend just reminded me; “…writing has always been one of your passions. This is not a passing phase or frivolity with you.”  This begs the question; why have I not been writing?

The sad truth is that I suffer from Paralysis by Analysis compounded by low self-esteem and procrastination caused by perfectionism!  Allow me to elaborate.  Due to the fact that I don’t think I’m good enough, I try to “analyse” what I should / could do better and end up stuck in an “if then” loop.  Just like a computer that freezes!  Instead of trusting my instincts (which, ironically, is what I always advise others to do) I keep on worrying that if I write about this or that topic then people won’t like me / like the way I write / they’ll misunderstand my intentions etc.  Basically this then “paralyses” me and I don’t write anything at all!

As if that isn’t bad enough, when I finally get “unstuck” and actually write something, I leave it in draft mode because I don’t believe it’s good enough to share!  Every time I write something, I always have the best of intentions.  Yet, so often, I leave a post unfinished because it doesn’t meet my perfectionist standard!  Ironically I’m never critical of other people’s posts 犀利士
(even when I pick up grammar and / or spelling mistakes) because I look past that to their message.  Invariably, I leave them a positive comment to encourage them.  This begs the question, why can’t I be as kind to myself as I am to others?

I call myself Phoenix because I’ve been burnt (psychologically) and this is supposed to be my “rebirth”.  Like the Phoenix I should rise from the ashes of my past and fly off, triumphant. Yet I still find myself chained by the same fears and feelings of worthlessness.  It doesn’t look like this Phoenix is going to fly anywhere anytime soon!

I once read that the first step towards wisdom is the acknowledgement of one’s own ignorance and failings.  I’ve totally mastered the first step … I just have no idea how to take the next one!!